Two years ago today

Taken May 12, 2010 Galveston Trip
It was two years ago today that officially Andrew and Kathlena became Shiflets. Time has passed so quickly and those two tiny Russian speaking children have blossomed into two confident, loving, adorable little kids. This second year has been a year of really getting to see a deeper level of their personalities emerge and take shape. With the addition of another younger brother there was a new time of bonding as the six of us experienced the birth of Calvin together. Watching Calvin grow through my pregnancy and as an infant has given us many occasions to speak about life and their adoption. The questions of where they were born and how have come up and we have chosen not to romanticise their past, but to be honest. Simply, much we do not know. Just like times in our lives when the Lord chooses not to reveal how or why something has happened, but we are to trust in faith knowing that He is good and His ways are best we are teaching our children (all of them) to accept that sometimes there will be no answers this side of eternity. What we could share with them as appropriate for their age we have been honest with them about. One thing for sure that we talk about is the amazing journey through faith that the Lord took us on to bring them home. The joys of seeing them for the first time, the pain of leaving them and the faith that the Lord would reunite us in His perfect timing.

It has been especially sweet to talk about those first few weeks with them and hear their side of the story since their English has broadened and matured to where they are able to better articulate what they remember. Of course most of Kathlena's memories are pictures and video she has seen, but that is okay as she is learning from hearing the story of love that joined us together. Andrew remembers snapshots of things and feelings of excitement over having a family...you can see it in his face when he tells the story of seeing us for the first time and leaving with us never to return to the orphanage. He was asked one time by some friends what his favorite thing about Russia was. His answer was simply, "meeting my parents". Wow! I am not sure I will ever grasp what that feeling was like for him. I know for me it was one of the happiest days of my life.

We spent the day together and had the opportunity to have dinner at a friends house. They too are adopting from Russia. They have a 14 month old son waiting for them now and Lord willing they will be bringing him home in little over a month. It was such a joy to share in their journey and see them meet their son for the first time...brings back sweet memories. We rejoice on this day for what the Lord has knit together in our family and for our dear friends who wait to bring their son home also.

We also talked about another family in our church who is right now in China with their daughter whom they will be bringing home soon. Adoption is something that is talked about frequently in our home and church and I am grateful that our children will grow up knowing many children who have been adopted from foreign lands and right here in America also.

While we have had struggles over the past two years too, the Lord has extended us much grace and continues to do so day after day as new things unfold. I love all of my children and treasure these days I have with them. I know they are but a vapor and before long their childhoods will be distant memories. How thankful I am to be their Mommy and to spend my days with them...a job I would not trade for anything else in this world.

First Post Placement

Whew!!! we made it through the mad dash of our first post placement report. The report itself was really no big deal. Especially, since we love to talk about our kids and how wonderful adoption has been for our family. The craziness comes with the time constraints of we couldn't meet with the social worker until after Nov. 1st(a Sat.) yet we have to have it to our agency notarized and apostilled (in Austin) by Nov. 15th(also a Sat. so really the 14th). Long story short-two carefully orchestrated FedEx envelopes, a really quick and wonderful social worker, and lots of prayers made all of this happen on time (hopefully, as the first leg of the race has gone well so far).

The main purpose in post placement reports is to smooth relationships with Russia and the U.S. Agencies that place children in families from Russia. Pictures are sent to ensure that the children are doing well. I am glad to help, but now on the other side of adoption I really do think that 3yrs of post placement reports is excessive for adoptive families to produce (one year should be sufficient). Especially, when each report costs upwards of $300. This is after a family who adopts 1-2 children has already spent upwards of $40,000-60, 000 to adopt to begin with. Would I spend this much all over again for my children? YOU bet I would, but should governments have this much jurisdiction over the affairs of adoptive families...Constitutionally speaking...no. If the government didn't it would take a fraction of the time and cost to adopt.

Unfortunately, the costs are only likely to go up with the implementation of the Homeland Security Agency and new Hague laws that go in effect as of this year. While in the news you hear of the great things that Hague is going to prevent what is not being reported is how the increase in government agencies involvement and forced compliance with new regulations will result in greater cost to the individual adoptive families (both time and money), fewer overall adoptions as a result and the complete shut down of some of the most poor countries in the world who have the greatest need for adoption. How the Hague Convention on Intercountry Adoption Might Affect You

Government was to protect the innocent...children who are legitimately in harmful, abusive situations should be removed from their family, but not by means of our current system where the government is unchecked-Children Removed from LDS Compound in Texas. But once children are out of immediate physical danger, job over for the government and it is time for the church to step in and find a loving stable home. Elaborate foster care systems, social workers-namely CPS do not hold a biblical world view of adoption or family for that matter, although many of these individuals are well meaning and even Christians, they are still agents of the state acting in behalf of what is best for the state not individuals. The bureaucracy that exists is unbelievable and many of the CPS agents who are trying to look out for the best interest of the individual child have their hands tied by too many cases, too many hoops to jump through and dealing with an ever increasing amount of responsibility as new regulations are constantly added which translates into more training and licensing for them.

Okay, I feel better now with that said, we are now cleared by the state for another 6 months until we must go through all of this again. I do have to say that we have one of those rare CPS social workers who really does have the best interest of the family and child as priority and delights to see children placed in loving biblical Christian homes. She has been a true blessing to us as we have navigated the waters of the state through our adoption. We praise the Lord for bringing her to us and granting us favor throughout our process of dealing with the unavoidable government intrusion in the adoption process.